Tweet Me

1. For one of my classes this semester, I am participating in a GM Marketing Competition. As part of the PR team, I am working on some social media stuff to help promote the discount for college students to buy GM vehicles. Students and recent grads can get up to $5,000 off and it can be paired with other incentives. Cool, huh? So here's where you come in: please follow the GM college discount program on twitter @ twitter.com/GMcollege. :)

2. I really wanted to look cute today, but it is seriously cold and windy. And in an effort not to flash the entire campus, I've decided that a cute skirt is not the best option. So instead, I am going for comfy-cute: soft blue jeans, black tennis shoes, black long sleeve, and really soft teal and purple plaid scarf!

Well, gotta run to class now. More later!

crabbiness juxtaposed with bliss

I am exhausted. Tired of waiting, I called the first internship that I applied for and quickly found out that, no, I hadn't gotten that one either. I knew it, but I was still angry, and not just because they were jerks and failed to get back to me. I am angry because I am a smart girl and I am ambitious and dammit, I deserve a good internship. But no, I am too inexperienced for even an internship... how the hell am I going to find a job?

As I'm sure you know from reading my lame and mostly crabby blog, I tend to be in a bad mood. You can thank school and work and lack of funds and lack of time and lack of experience and whatever for my foul mood. I don't know what to do about it. Seriously, I am stressed and I can't help it; it's just the situation I am in. But apparently my bad mood isn't just affecting me, it's affecting the Boyfriend. And he's mad at me for being in a bad mood most of the time. I feel guilty for upsetting him, but at the same time, if I can't talk to him about it, who can I? So now I'm wondering what a normal amount of "bad mood" is and if I need to seek out some happy pills. Oh, brother. On top of all this, I am eating like crap and not working out and generally feeling yucky. Ugh.

So back to the internship crap... if I am too inexperienced for an internship (both of them chose interns with more experience in the field), how am I going to have enough experience for a job. I'm taking this really personally, as you can see, but I am upset. I wanted this so badly. Not only was it going to be a strong step into the right direction as far as my career is concerned, but it was going to help with my money problems. So now I'm thinking of back up plans just in case this strategic communication (a.k.a. advertising/public relations) doesn't work out. But I'm so cranky about everything, that nothing sounds like a better solution. Teaching? Nah, not enough money. Own my own business? Too risky. And it goes on and on like this, just as it always does.

Sorry for being cranky...

***On a brighter note, one of my friends from one of my high school jobs just got engaged! She has pictures of the ring on facebook and wrote all about the proposal:

She was asked by friends at her school to come to a project meeting, and then they kidnapped her and blindfolded her, throwing her into the backseat of a car. Her best friend was waiting in the car and took the 100+ mile drive with her back to her hometown. The ride was accompanied by four little envelopes with romantic notes inside that she could open along the way. When she reached her hometown destination, she opened the last note: "Meet me at our spot" which happened to be a big hill overlooking Lake Michigan, the same place she first told him she loved him. There he was waiting, neatly dressed and ready to give her a romantic speech before he got down on one knee and asked her to marry him.

Soooo adorable! I am so happy for her. :)

what's done is done

It's raining today, very heavily in fact. And who couldn't find an umbrella before she left? Me. And who didn't think to wear a clothing item with a hood? Me.

I tried to look cute today since I've decided there's a direct correlation between how I look and how I feel. Gladiator sandals, leggings, and a little long-sleeved dress. Not a bad look, really, but the weather is making me sad, cold, and wet. No good, my friends.

I arrived on campus early today after getting lunch with my mom. I headed straight for the library and was grateful that the rain was letting up. I checked me e-mail, and there it was:

An e-letter from one of the internships I applied for. The one I really, really wanted. The one that was going to pay really well and be damn good experience. I opened the file and read through the very short letter.

I didn't get it.

Ugh, I could just curl up in a ball and die. I am very upset that I wasn't chosen, and I'm also a little angry that they didn't have the decency to call me and tell me themselves. Whatever, I guess. What's done is done.

So there you have it:

Crappy weather.

Crappy day.

(photo from here)

anything helps

On my way to school today, I saw three homeless men standing on the side of the street, clutching cardboard signs asking for anything drivers had to offer. At first I only saw one man, scruffy beard and dirty skin, wearing old camouflaged hunting attire and a matching cap. His sign read, "Hungry and needin' soap. Anything helps." When I saw his face and the sad, disheartened expression on it, I had to look away.

The light turned green and I drove around the corner, passing another young man leaning up against the traffic light pole, also holding a cardboard sign out for people to see. Soon I was stopped at another red light, only to see the third young man pacing in the median. In one hand was his sign: "Traveling and hungry, anything helps." In the other hand he held a leash tightly, a scrawny puppy pulling at the other end. He wore a worn-out leather jacket, and I could see two neck tattoos peeking out above his collar. Someone two cars in front of me reached out a hand with some money, and he hurried over to the vehicle to retrieve it, head bowed perhaps in shame or embarrassment. My heart sunk to see the emptiness in his eyes, and again I turned away because it was too hard to watch him stand there and plead for help.

I wanted to do something, really I did. A few dollars were inches away from me in my wallet, but I never reached for them. I was scared and felt ashamed for them. It broke my heart to see them all standing there hoping that someone would reach out their hand to help them, and I am ashamed of myself for not being a more kind and generous person to someone who needed help. If I were to ever find myself in a situation like theirs, I would want someone to help me.

(picture from here)

Other things to mention:

1. The Boyfriend and I have been dating for TWO years today!

2. Yoga is amazing. My body felt so good yesterday after I completed my yoga video.

3. I am seriously craving an iced chai and any excuse not to work on my homework.

planting seeds for my money tree

I woke up this morning already having a case of the "blahs"... and then I check my bank account. FML. Where's my money tree?

Let me explain how I got to this sad, sad point. I've never been much of a saver. I suck at budgeting myself and I "nickel and dime myslef to death", as my mother says. I'm a sucker for a bargain. However, after the credit card bills got bigger, I realized that my poor habits needed to stop. And I got better at managing my money. Well, a bit better.

Do you all remember my food court job at the wholesale store? I quit because I was being completely unappreciated and was diminished to tears by an evil manager. I quit without much in savings and without another job to go to. Not smart, I know that, but it needed to be done. So that's when I started pinching pennies. This happened in the beginning of June.

After a few weeks of searching, I found a job at a boutique and was all excited about finally working in fashion. Less than two weeks later, I got a phone call saying I was fired. I had never been fired before, so I took this pretty hard. My boss was nuts, to say the least, but regardless of her irrational behavior, I was without a job. Again. I started searching for change in the couch cushions.

I was luckily able to pick up a few hours at the salon I had previously worked at, but that wasn't without its own drama. The small checks I got from working a few hours here and there were barely enough to keep me going, and I thank God for my wonderful Boyfriend who has paid for practically everything since this chaos started.

Finally, I have found a job as an employee at an electronics retail store, and it is going well. The first check I got was small, as was to be expected. But I'm hoping my check on Friday blesses me with some dough to get me by. Also, I'm dying to hear back from two paid internships that I applied for. Cross your fingers for me!

Moral of my Story...

1. Have enough in savings to get you by when times get rough.

2. Learn how to budget yourself and kick those bad habits.

I'm definitely working on #2 right now, and I'd love your advice.

What do you do to save money?

(money tree found here)

love is in the air

Oh... Em... Gee!

I am seriously in love with these Christian Louboutin shoes, originally designed for Princess Diana. Vintage beauty at it's best, brought to my attention by the also lovely mondmelodie. Thanks darling! Someday I will own a pair of shoes as stunning as these...

BFFs and movie madness

1. I need advice...

...because I don't want to overstep any boundaries. What is the protocol for having a guy for a close friend? As I'm sure I've said before, I'm lacking in the BFF department these days, and with this new job, I was hoping to find a really awesome friend to hang out with. I did not, however, expect my potential BFF to be a dude.

I've already mentioned him to the Boyfriend, and he seems pretty cool about it, but something makes me think that this friendship could potentially make him uncomfortable. The bond I have with this new male friend is strictly platonic and I have no question that it will stay that way. However, I still feel like this new budding friendship will have to be different than bonds I've shared with past female BFFs.

Are there different rules or guidlines one must follow for having a guy BFF?

2. I plan to live at the movie theatre this fall...

...because of all the sweet flicks that are coming out. Most importantly is Heath Ledger's last film, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. He died while making this film, so another one of my favorite actors, Johnny Depp, needed to finish it for him. Here's the trailer:

Super excited about that! Then, my other favorite actor, Morgan Freeman, will be in a film about Nelson Mandela, called Invictus. I love everything that Morgan Freedman does, so I doubt this will be any different. Other flicks I want to see:

Sherlock Holmes

Up In The Air

Precious

2012

An Education

Capitalism: A Love Story

Whip It

Lovely Bones

considering the possibility

I don't know what's gotten into me lately, but everywhere I go I see adorable little babies or beautifully plump pregnant women. And it's like they're trying to say to me, "Look at us? Aren't we just the bestest things you've ever seen?"

I've always said that I never want to have kids. If an oopsie baby happens, I'll keep it and love it, but I have never thought I'd ever plan to make a family. I could name a zillion reasons why I've strongly held this opinion: what if the baby wasn't born healthy? kids cost a ton and what if I'm too selfish for that? what if they died before me? kids misbehave a ton and what if I don't have the patience for that? what if they grow up and become terrible rebelious teens and die of a drug overdose? I could go on and on for days.

And maybe I need to be more specific. I've never wanted to raise a child, but I've always been extremely interested in being a surrogate. I think it would be a wonderful experience to be pregnant and then give someone the gift of a child. But it isn't something I've ever wanted for myself.

But something is different now. Maybe it's because I'm getting older and maturing, but I'm starting to wonder, "Would be it so bad to have a family?" Like I said before, I'm noticing adorable little children and their happy parents and glowing pregnant mommies-to-be. What if someday when I've got a house and a stable career and I've had my fun... what if I decide to become a mom?

Thank goodness for me, the Boyfriend could go wither way, although right now I think we're both leaning towards just spending our lives as just the two of us. Anyway, I thought that it was weird how I, someone so insistant that she'd never had kids, is now considering it as a possibility later in life. Hmm.

Have you ever felt this way, either about children or something else?

(picture from here)

L-O-V-E

I read a bunch of blog posts about love today and so I thought I needed to comment on love myself. And, this awesome picture that I borrowed from A Cheery Disposition really makes me want to get another tattoo!

Oh, and if you aren't reading A Cup of Jo, you need to be! She has this delightful thing going on right now where people post their secrets to a happy marriage. It's inspiring!

Anyway, back to my opinions about this thing called LOVE. When I fell in love with the Boyfriend, I knew it. I knew that there were never going to be other men for me. It didn't take us long at all to start wondering what our lives will be like together.

I would be lying if I said things were perfect. We argue about stuff and we we disagree about things, sometimes big things, but we work it out. Why? Because we are the best of friends and only care about the others happiness and well-being.

Do I check out other guys? Sure. But I know that no one else in the world could love me the way that the Boyfriend does. I mean, seriously, who else would be willing to move into my parent's basement with me to save money for a wedding and a house? Exactly. I've hit the jackpot here, and no other guy could be as awesome as he his.

Why is he awesome? We understand each other. We've shared similar life experiences and know what it's like. He keeps me stable and I keep him guessing! I try to convince him to eat more vegetables and he tries to keep me from buying too many shoes. We work together well. We mesh. It's like that adorable sloth Sid says in Ice Age 2 (yes, I love cartoons!): "She's tons of fun and you're no fun at all - She completes you." And that's how I feel about us. We complete each other.

Okay, now someone needs to tie me to a chair so I don't wander down to the tattoo shop. Eh, I think it might be too late for that! :)

drastic changes ahead?

So I'm thinking I need a hot new look to brighten my mood and lift my spirits. I've been thinking about this look for awhile (after seeing something similar on Gossip Girl, of course) and I'm wondering if I should take the dive and just go for it!

I currently hair hair almost that length (I've been growing it our for quite some time... it had been dangerously short!) and I have blunt cut bangs similar to this, although they are much softer looking. The big difference is the color: I currently have dark blonde with lighter highlights. I had been practically black for awhile so this had been a change for the lighter already.

My current look appeals to me for a few reasons: it's natural looking, and my natural hair color is a dark blonde so I can go a very long time between colorings. And when you're poor like me and no longer get the perks of working at a salon, not having to color often is very nice.

However, I feel the need to be inspired and do something drastic. And I always thought I couldn't do bleach blonde because I'm really pale, but this model looks pretty pale but can pull off this punk look. But one question: is this look too "teen" for a 21 year old? I'm looking for internships and I'm afraid that this will make me look immature. On the other hand, will it make me look edgy and ambitious? Hmmm...

I think this decision will have to wait for another day! Your thoughts are definitely welcome. :)

(photo from the Forever 21 website somewhere...)

3 about me

1. I seriously need to start working out. My lazy butt needs to get off of the couch and at least go for a freaking walk once in awhile because this new pudge isn't going to take care of itself. The Boyfriend and I played tennis twice, but our little workout plan has come to quite the halt. We've been talking about going for a walk the past few nights, but the couch and television have won us over every time.

2. The past few days have been a bit rough for me; I've been feeling depressed and tired, but I'm attributing it all to stress. I started classes last week and my workload this semester is going to be unreal. On top of that, I suck at time management and I'm having a tough time getting back into the swing of things. Work is also proving to be stressful because its requiring a lot of learning and it's been more difficult than I anticipated. On top of that, I had an interview for an internship and have another one later in the week. How on earth can I handle this all at once? That's a typical problem for me: taking on more than I can handle and being unable to admit that it's too much.

3. I need to find opportunities to be creative. I need to get out my camera more often, I need to write or read in my free time, and I need to get out my drawing pad for more than just one sketch every few months. My mother wants me to paint a picture for her living room, but I feel so uninspired and unfamiliar to being creative that I'm afraid to do it! With my busy schedule, hopefully I can find time to get a little artsy here and there.

more excitement...

So I love Gossip Girl. I am addicted to the show, after having discovered it with a friend whom I visited in Iowa. We stayed up practically all night watching as many episodes as we could possibly keep our eyes open for and I've been obsessed ever since.

Coming to Target on September 13 is a line of clothing inspired by Gossip Girl. Designed by Anna Sui, the line is filled with amazing items that I'm absolutely dying to have. Here's a sneak peek at what I've found:

Vanessa

Jenny

Serena

Blair

Blair

Again, I am obsessed!

(this and more found here)

Soooo excited!

So I know that if you ask me what my favorite movie is, I will immediately say, "10 Things I Hate About You" because, well, its fabulous. But then I will probably say, "And at a close second is Boondock Saints" because it's a freaking epic movie. Epic. If you haven't seen it, rent it NOW. Put it in your queue. Seriously.

Now, to the point of my post: Boondock Saints 2 is coming out October 30th. Oh em gee. I seriously can not wait! Here's the trailer for those of you who are as pumped about this as I am...

do I really have to go?

Sadly, I have to return to the real world today. Summer fun, goodbye. Books and lectures and homework, hello. On the upside, I only have one class today so I get to ease back into things at least. I'm also considering dropping one class which would probably help. Oh, and all my classes this semester are in buildings I've never been in before, so I'm going to look really awesome today carrying around a map!

The Boyfriend brought me home a nice surpise yesterday: molasses cookies! Seriously though, I used to get molasses cookies all the time from Hy-Vee when I was living in Iowa. When I moved back here, I sadly discovered that none of our grocery stores carry them! So last time I was visiting friends in Iowa, I made sure to stock up. Imagine my surprise when the Boyfriend handed me a huge box of fresh-baked molasses cookies that he brought home from Costco. Yum!!!

Early this morning, I was rudely awoke by the shockingly loud sound of the lawn service right outside my window. At what time, you ask? 6AM. And let me tell you, I am not a morning person. I was thoroughly peeved by this. And to make things better, it scared the hell out of my kitties who dodged into the bedroom, causing the door to swing open and the bright sunlight of early morning to come rushing in. Grr....

Currently Dreading: the commute to campus and having to rush to work afterwards.

Currently Sipping On: a mini Naked juice; I feel so healthy when I drink them, and I'm hoping all the natural fruits and veggies will boost my mood.

Currently Feeling: in denial that the semester really is starting today, whether I want it to or not.

(photo of a 1950's UW-River Falls student found here)